Marriage is a fragile covenant, a commitment of love and respect. Even the strongest of marital relationships are vulnerable to daily conflict. In my experience as a wife, I have come to realize that one of the greatest threats to my marriage is…Me!
I love my husband and I am diligent at telling him just that every single day. Yet, even with all the love I have for my husband there are times that I react very selfishly in our relationship.
I am not perfect and I am reminded of this time and time again. I am daily faced with a battle between my spirit, desiring to live God’s Holy way, and my flesh, desiring to live my way. One way looks to the good of others, seeking peace through humility, while the other is self-focused only interested in what will benefit…Me!
I believe God’s ways are not only beautiful, but extremely beneficial. As I strive to live God’s ways I experience an incredible relationship with my husband. To do so requires intentionality, time spent seeking more and more of God, reading His Word, and practicing self-control.
Over the years I have noticed that some of the most lethal of conflicts occur in my marriage when I am not actively seeking after God. After several days of not reading the Bible or fervently praying, my attitude becomes sour and my heart is self-focused.
And I become one of the greatest threats to my marriage.
I become easily irritated with my husband, I talk rudely to him to get a point across, I keep track of his wrongs, yet I am unforgiving, I sometimes get jealous of where he spends his time, I lose hope in our relationship and I lack the faith needed to get through as a team…this is NOT love!
When I realize that I am acting in selfishness in my marriage I can almost always attribute it to a lack of intentional intimacy with God. Trying to live without God is miserable, not just for me, but for my husband as well. The threat of trying to maintain a loveless marriage corrodes both of us from the inside out.
The key to change: Spend quality time with God through reading His Word and prayer.
I am imperfect and when I attempt to do things my way, my imperfections take the lead causing more strife than one can bear.
When I trust God and allow Him to lead, His grace is sufficient for me and true love thrives.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9
If you are experiencing conflict in your marriage, take a moment to evaluate and examine your heart to see if you are the threat. Spend some intentional time with God today and watch as He protects your marriage for you!
Jen, Unveiled Wife