When you’re raising a family, your days are often chock full from start to finish with messes to clean, babies to rock to sleep, sports practices to attend, library books to read, doctor’s appointments to make, lunches to pack… the list never ends! How do you find time to connect with your spouse when every moment is already full?
I’ve been there. And I want to share with you 8 ways even the busiest couples can find time to connect! Before I give you these ten creative ideas, can I give you an idea of what to do with the time you find? If you want to make the most of the few moments you have with your spouse, ask them these three questions and have them ask the same questions back to you. They’re guaranteed to help you use the time you have to connect in a deep way.
- What is going well for you right now?
- What are you struggling with right now?
- What is something you need from me?
Here are 8 ways even the busiest couples can find time to connect:
- Use your lunch break to check-in. Mornings and evenings are often rushed and chaotic, but if you both have a lunch break why not take 10 minutes to call and check in with each other?
- Take the scenic route. It’s not often my husband and I drive together in the same car, but when we do we try to take the long way home and use the few extra minutes to talk, even if the kids are in the back seat!
- Don’t divide and conquer. Household chores can consume a lot of time in the evenings. One thing my husband and I do to make this time work for us and not against us is do all the chores together. Chores aren’t always a joy, but doing them together gives us the chance to talk!
- Play hooky. If you absolutely cannot find the time in your week to spend a few moments focusing on your spouse, then I give you permission to play hooky from a less important obligation. The dishes can wait one night. Could you reschedule dinner with your friends next week? Your marriage is important enough to make space for!
- Spouse before screens. There are very few marriages that wouldn’t benefit from a spouse before screens rule. Before you turn on Netflix or scroll and zone out at night, make it a priority to look your spouse in the eyes and ask how they’re doing.
- Try a little couch time. When I was growing up, my parents instituted something called “couch time.” This simply meant that when my dad got home from work, my parents took 10-15 minutes to sit down on the couch and talk about their days. Kids were not allowed to be in the room and we were not allowed to interrupt my parents for those 15 minutes.
- Date night in. When you do your grocery shopping for the week, take a moment to add a favorite dessert to your cart. Having a special treat to look forward to will give you a reason to make sure you spend some one on one time with each other!
- Rise and connect. Sleep is precious as a parent, but maybe even more precious is feeling in sync with your spouse. Early mornings can be a great time to find the peace and quiet it takes to truly connect. Just be sure there’s coffee and you’ll be set!
Did any of these ideas stick out to you? Don’t let this be another busy week that gets away from you before you can connect with your significant other. Your marriage is important and you CAN find the time to invest in it, even if you have to get a little creative!
Shelby Turner is a stay-at-home-mom, speaker and writer who lives in Kansas City, Missouri. She is all about helping women kick the pursuit of a picture-perfect life to the curb and inspiring them to live a purposeful life instead. She founded The Gathering, a bold, no fluff monthly event that connects women with God in a real way. She’d love for you to follow along with her on Instagram at @shelbyraeturner!