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The Power and Necessity of Grief

"The Power and Necessity of Grief" For the Family
Grief leads us to God. The Bible often refers to grief as “lament”. It simply means to express sorrow or grief. It’s so important we understand, even — maybe especially — as Christians, it is okay and necessary to grieve. It is an emotional and physical response to sorrow that our hearts and bodies must do. 
Grieving doesn’t only need to happen due to the loss of a loved one. Grieving can and should happen at any significant loss we have in life. Loss of a job, loss of a relationship, loss of health, or a home. 
Feel the Pain Before Trying to Figure It Out
Any step toward healing or transformation has to start first with feeling the pain before trying to figure out the pain. Much grief is unresolved because people fail to feel it. Honesty is an expression of our humanity. When we lament, we are refusing to live in denial. We are acknowledging real hurt. We are naming the pain.
When we lament, we are admitting the world is not right. It’s not as it should be. It’s not what it was, and it is not yet what it will be. When we lament, we are resisting the temptation to run from God. To lament is not only to hurt but also to take our hurt to God. Our focus should never be on the hurt alone. Otherwise, we can become consumed with it instead of transformed by it. 
Some people are afraid to give up their grief because they believe it makes them look weak or because their pain ties them to their loss; makes them feel closer. They believe grief makes them unfeeling — but in reality, grief is feeling the most. Everyone’s grief will look different. 
The Hurt Alerts Us That Something is Off
For some people, suffering causes them to doubt God’s existence. Their hurt or disappointment lead them to walk away from their faith. They give up. But where do they turn? If we are just accidents, alone in the universe, then why do the things that go terribly wrong not feel right? If we are just surviving, getting by longer, and better than others, then why are we so moved by tragedy, injustice, sickness, and seemingly senseless evil? Why does cancer, miscarriage, premature death, or an unfair job termination hurt so badly? 
The answer is because we know better. Because deep down we all carry the faint memories of life as God intended in the Garden of Eden (Gen. 1-2). Deep down we all know there is a God. That life and joy and beauty and truth and goodness and justice are real things. Sacred things. Things essential to what it means to be human. 
Be Honest About the Pain
One of the best things we can do in our hurt is to be honest. We need to be honest: with ourselves, with others, and especially with God. We live in a culture that tends to numb the pain. Deny it. We are often tempted to distract ourselves. Entertain ourselves. And many times while walking through suffering we even feel the pressure to have it all together for the sake of others. 
But if God is going to meet us and mold us in the storm, what we need most is to be real. As much as we’d love to escape our pain, it’s important to remember that we first have to enter our pain. 
In a Boat in the Middle of a Lake

Your Storm Doesn’t Have to Sink You

At some point in our lives, we all find ourselves in a boat in the middle of a lake. We might be there due to a job loss or the death of a loved one. Maybe disability, divorce, or financial insecurity has stranded us. We found ourselves feeling battered after five miscarriages and then surrounded by the waves with Patrick’s cancer diagnosis at age forty-three. We were alone. Drifting. And that’s when our transformation began.

In this compassionate and powerful book, we weave together lessons from their own experience with insightful Bible teaching to remind us that one of the greatest ways God transforms us is through trials. As we unpack why Jesus called the disciples into the middle of a lake when dry ground was so safe and comfortable, we help you:

  • understand why the depth of our hurt enables us to experience deep hope;
  • learn to conquer fear to experience the freedom God has for us; and
  • discover how God uses chaos, and not just the classroom, to shape and work through us.

Today—in your confusion about God’s intentions, your disappointment over lost dreams, your disillusionment about prayer—God is offering hope. Because Jesus is still Lord over the water. And while he is not moved by the waves, he is moved by you. And this flood might just be a path to abundance.

 In a Boat in the Middle of a Lake releases in less than a week, but you can pre-order TODAY and get instant access to the first three chapters. 

You will also receive both a 

Scripture Memorization Guide. Download your comprehensive scripture memory guide curated by Patrick and Ruth to help you through any storm you face.


Exclusive access to a private Facebook group with us. 

Here is how to redeem your bonuses:

1. Pre-order your book anywhere books are sold including:


Barnes & Noble




2. Go to INABOATBOOK.COM to grab your pre-order bundle of bonuses!

With you,
Patrick and Ruth

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