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Every Marriage Needs Kindness

ByRuth Schwenk

Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
—EPHESIANS 4:32

What do you think of when you think of kindness? Would you use the word kind to describe your interactions with your husband? Kindness is a key ingredient for every life-giving, God-honoring marriage.

Every marriage needs kindness

We honor God in our marriages when we treat our spouses the way He treats us. In Christ, God did not come with harsh and demanding words. Jesus came with kindness. The Bible encourages us to treat others in the same way Christ has treated us. We are to be “kind and compassionate” because that is how God acts toward us and because that’s how we want to be treated.

Kindness is being gentle in how we talk (Proverbs 15:1). It’s treating each other with respect. Kindness includes smiling at each other, encouraging each other, and being willing to forgive. In marriage, kindness is being concerned with our spouses’ happiness more than our own.

How can you foster kindness in your marriage? What can you do to bring your husband joy with your words, attitude, and actions? “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Allow God to cultivate in you a heart that is kind, gentle, compassionate, and forgiving. Ask the Father to help you be more concerned with your spouse’s happiness than your own.

Father, help my husband and me treat each other tenderly, being careful of how we speak and act toward each other. Give us each a heart that really does want the best for the other. I pray that You would guard our lips and keep us from being harsh, critical, and sarcastic. Instead, may our words offer sincerity, respect, and kindness. Help us do for each other as You have done for us. In Jesus’ name, amen.

What prevents you from being kind to your spouse at times? What is one way you can bring happiness to your spouse? We’d love to hear!

Excerpted with permission from The Better Mom Devotional by Ruth Schwenk, copyright Ruth Schwenk. Available now everywhere books are sold.

The Better Mom Devotional

Ruth is the wife of a pastor, who is her best friend and the love of her life. She is a blessed homeschooling mother to her four beautiful children, and she eagerly awaits meeting her five others in heaven. Ruth is a graduate of Moody Bible Institute in Chicago.  She has a passion for following God, leading worship, rescuing orphans, and inspiring others to create a God honoring family.

She thoroughly enjoys warm spring breezes, blooming lilacs, tall skim mochas with whipped cream, root-lifter, eye cream, gel polish, laughing (lots of it), venti iced teas, exclamation points!!, family worship time, and snuggling up to read a good book with her family.

Ruth is a speaker, writer, and creator of The Better Mom. She can also be found at For the Family, a site just recently launched by her and her husband, Patrick.

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